ex cathedra: The Two: Helpfulness & Manipulation

Thursday, December 02, 2010

The Two: Helpfulness & Manipulation

Three of my closest friends are Twos. And they all have a noticeable "wing" personality of the One, the Moralist. Makes it interesting to see how they shift from warm compassion to self-righteous wrath.

(I should note that these outlines are by Margaret Frings Keys, not by me.)

Special Gift: Warmth and ability to help people feel comfortable

Self-Definition: "I'm helpful."

Shadow Issue: Parasitic pride

Rejected Element: One's own needs

Addiction: Service/manipulation

Strength Needed: Appropriate self-value (Humility)

Defense Mechanism: Repression

Psychological Disturbance: Hysteria/dependent personality

Talk Style: Help and advice

Preoccupations Include:

Gaining approval and avoiding rejection, pride in the importance of oneself in relationships.
Submission to a powerful other, then identifying with the other to avoid feeling depressed.
Concern about limited personal freedom.
Altering oneself to meet the needs of others.
Empathy with others' feelings; adapting to their wishes as a way of assuring their love.

Focus:

Personal emphasis on privilege ("me first").
Couple emphasis on aggression/seduction.
Community emphasis on ambition.

Life Task: To move from dependence on approval to knowledge of personal strength to meet one's own needs. This usually requires personal loss. The resulting depression can lead to a more accurate self-assessment and understanding of tasks.

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