Some words about my Dad, who died in 2009 after a long and terrible illness.
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3 comments:
Anonymous
said...
Today, I find myself wondering how my father will react when- if- I come out to him. I don't want him to approve, or even understand. Actually, I think I would be even more upset if he was okay with my homosexuality, especially after despising it in other men for so long. I would be happier with a silent agreement not to discuss it than embracing my life.
He says that his chiefest concern is my happiness. Will he tolerate my choices if they lead me to lead a life he hates, even if they save me from a miserable life? Especially since he thinks I will be damning myself to hell?
I don't have the answers. I just hope my relationship with my dad is the way it should be, whatever that is.
On this Father's Day, a toast: to our fathers, that we are close to them in this life, that they may never have to bury us, that they look out for us when they pass on, and that we may look back on life and laugh with them when our own lives end.
The great men of history tended not to have the time for family life -they had families but never invested in them. So your dad did the opposite - did what is needed to build a strong society. He created and supported his family. From your descriptions of your family - I'd say he succeeded beyond belief. Hollywood will never celebrate him but all his descendents will, as well as those of us who recognize how important people like him are in our world.
Well said, Leah. Those great men you spoke of become fathers to other things- their countries, their soldiers, their life's work. You can't have it all in this life.
3 comments:
Today, I find myself wondering how my father will react when- if- I come out to him. I don't want him to approve, or even understand. Actually, I think I would be even more upset if he was okay with my homosexuality, especially after despising it in other men for so long. I would be happier with a silent agreement not to discuss it than embracing my life.
He says that his chiefest concern is my happiness. Will he tolerate my choices if they lead me to lead a life he hates, even if they save me from a miserable life? Especially since he thinks I will be damning myself to hell?
I don't have the answers. I just hope my relationship with my dad is the way it should be, whatever that is.
On this Father's Day, a toast: to our fathers, that we are close to them in this life, that they may never have to bury us, that they look out for us when they pass on, and that we may look back on life and laugh with them when our own lives end.
-Sean
The great men of history tended not to have the time for family life -they had families but never invested in them.
So your dad did the opposite - did what is needed to build a strong society. He created and supported his family.
From your descriptions of your family - I'd say he succeeded beyond belief.
Hollywood will never celebrate him but all his descendents will, as well as those of us who recognize how important people like him are in our world.
Well said, Leah. Those great men you spoke of become fathers to other things- their countries, their soldiers, their life's work. You can't have it all in this life.
-Sean
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